I, Voyeur: Hell is Other People

At the bar again with another zombie, I began talking to a beautiful sister drinking cognac on the rocks. “What’s the worst thing that ever happened to you?” I asked. “I guess the time my daddy died,” she said. “My father died a few years ago,” I told her. “It’ll get better.” She looked at me like I was made of shit. “I ain’t talking about my father. I’m talking about my boyfriend.” At that moment I sensed someone rushing up behind me. It was the brother with the light-up tooth; he pushed between us and ordered a shot of gin. I gulped my zombie and started talking to him, figuring that my acknowledgment of his outrageousness gave us some kind of camaraderie. “What’s the worst thing that ever happened to you?” I asked stupidly. He gave me a look of pure evil and hatred, his tooth flashing in my face. “The first time I ever met a white man, that’s the worst thing that ever happened to me. And the best thing that’ll ever happen to me is when all y’all white motherfuckers are gone.” He turned and walked into the crowd.

“I’m sorry about that,” the girl said. “But you gotta understand. It isthe worst thing that ever happened to him. Could be it’s the worst thing that ever happened to me.” She held her drink and stood up. “And maybe you shouldn’t ask us that question, or you’ll be telling people that the worst thing that ever happened to you happened here.”

—Anthony Ausgang